That’s the Foreigners way, bf/gf live together. Then if things goes well the guy propose then get married. No biggie, but in the Philippines duh! such a big deal for choserang 🐸
For the record, not only her. All the three hosts of the podcast agree on a live in arrangement. It's 2021 already. Contempt on taboos such as living in together should have no place in the society.
1:07 alam mookay lang naman kung ang tao magpakasal. Okay lang din kung hindi. Personal choice tawag dun. Mas pangit sa tao ang maging pakialamera at judgmental. Sinusuka ng langit, niluluwa ng lupa. Sorry not sorry
Pag mga comment na ganito like kay anon 1:07 talaga. Nakaka walang gana. Sabi lang naman ni 12:23 na mga talks na ganito hindi na dapat stigma ngayon. Lola ka na po siguro.
1:07 para namang ang mapakasalan ng lalake ang greatest reward na pwedeng makuha ng babae?! NOOO. Never ba pumasok sa isip mo na yung lalake na ang may gusto pero ang babae ang may ayaw? For strong, financially able, wealthy, non-religous women, wala naman gaanong bearing ang marriage, so bakit pa? Hassle pa kung hindi mag work out. Hindi lahat gaya mong patay na patay mapakasalan.
Agree ako sa live in muna bago kasal, as in may plano magpakasal, lalo na sa Pinas. Una, ang mahal ng annulment sa atin no, jusko! 2nd baka pagkasal na at ayaw sa ugali ng asawa, ay wla ka ng magagawa, kasal ka na eh. Lol, kung ayaw nyo sa live in, then go! Lol, walang pilitan. Wag din kayong pa holy.
Wow, I am more shocked at those comments justifying a living-in situation than the old adage from Anon 1:07. Wala sa panahon or ciglo ng mundo ang pagkakaroon ng solid moral convictions, core value po iyan. Paano nagiging katanggap tanggap sa mga babae o lalaki ang pagpapagamit lang sa ka live in nila. Kung sawa na palit nanaman ng partner. Not Anon 1:07, and definitely not a Lola.
To be fair relatively new concept ang kasal sa society natin cause our ancestors just have a go at it lol. And mas bago pa ang pagpapakasal/pagcohabitate dahil sa "love" cause people used to get together to gain power, build wealth, or have someone to work their farmland with them. Kung tutuusin yung hookup culture ngayon is just us coming back to our roots. And I dunno, hindi naman dapat magkasalungat yung marriage at cohabitation, they're both means para magkaroon ng union ang dalawa...or more na individuals. Dahil prevalent at mas accessible na nga ang hookups, parang yun na ang alternative sa kasal/cohabitation. Nowadays it's marriage/cohabitation vs. casual sex.
Yung idiomatic expression sa 1.07 comment eh para sa self-worth yan ng isang tao. Para sa akin hindi masama ang dating. Karaniwan angkop sa kababaihan yan dahil supppsedly mas makahulugan sa babae ang pagkakaroon ng sexual relationship. Pero kung kaswal kaswal lang para sa babae yung pakikipag talik at payag na nobya lamang walang pormal na commitment, although wala naman tayong magagawa doon, eh pangit talaga tingin ng mga tao sa ganyan. Walang masama kung mas pahahalagahan ng babae ang kanyang halaga bilang tao at maging mapanuri sa pagpili ng taong tunay na mamahalin, di yung pag parausan lang hanggang ayaw na tapos papalit palit ng partner. Wag ninyo ako awayin ha.
Walang masama sa kasal. Wala din masama sa hindi kasal. Choice iyon ng bawat tao. May pros at cons bawat desisyon. Depende sa kaya mong tanggapin. Wag kayo magmayabang na parang jackpot na ikasal dahil alam naman natin na hindi yan totoo. Wag kayo mandamay kung miserable kayo!
Bakit ba tingin ng mga babae na kapag ‘free’ sila makipag relationship sa kung kanikanino nila gusto eh considered ‘female empowerment’ yun?
I get na being able to freely choose, in a general sense, is indeed empowering. BUT to just loosen one’s morals and settle for a promiscuous lifestyle is not being free. Instead one becomes a victim of their own poor choices to demean themselves and settle for a life of being ‘just’ a ‘meantime girl’.
Considered ba na goal ang pagiging ‘meantime girl’? Is that something to aspire to?
Or justification Lang ng mga iba dito dahil sa ganon na path ‘napunta’ buhay nila?
Mas agree ako sa live-in arrangement kasi you will really get to know a person pag magkasama na kayo sa ilalim ng iisang bubong like how they handle their finances, how they settle arguments and how they stay loyal... There are many things you'll find out about a person when you live with them. For some people, it's better to be prepared than to be surprised after the wedding na di pala sila compatible ng husband nila.
If you're in a long-term relationship and considering marriage then it's not a bad idea to live together muna. Yan ang tunay na litmus test. Pero if you're still young and you're not really looking to get married, wag na lang muna mag-live in. Wag din magpapabuntis sa live-in partner kung di din naman ready magpakasal.
It's not for everyone tho. I've lived with my partner since 2019 tapos dinaanan na namin ang pandemic, unemployment, depression and typical adjustment issues ng mag-asawa. Di kami naghiwalay, di din naging issue ang cheating. We only grew together and became strong for each other. So far, so good kasi 2021 na and we're planning a small, intimate wedding. May happy ending din naman kahit nakipag-live in ka bago mag-asawa. :)
1:07 Nothing healthy or moral about that. Napaka archaic na statement used to scare ONLY WOMEN and control their actions, deny their sexuality and independence.
2:53, hindi porke kasal ay hindi naghihiwalay o nagtsi-cheat. Nasaan ang commitment doon?
1:09, agree, kapag hindi kayo kasal, walang habol sa assets at sa lahat ng pinaghirapan mo. Kapag financially independent ang tao, mas pinag-iingatan ang kabuhayan niya kesa sa kasal.
10:56 nothing is ever guaranteed in this life lol. And bec life will always have its struggles, you wanna make sure you marry someone who is aligned with your values. Now, that doesn't guarantee you won't have differences either. Both of you have leave your ego at the door and have to commit to make the marriage work. There are exceptions that makes ending a marriage necessary - e.g abuse. If you're entering into a relationship thinking your partner is going to cheat or robs you of your money, why even date or enter into a relationship? Doh.
1:07 Nag live in kami ng ilang years ng jowa ko, ngayon asawa ko na. No regrets sa mga decisions namin before getting married. Masayang-masaya parin kami hanggang ngayon. Tsaka wag mo kaming ikumpara sa baka. Excuse me. Nananahimik yung baka, sinasali mo sa problema mo.
1220, the thing is sa pilipinas WALANG DIVORCE. so even if inaabuso ka na, you cant really “leave” the marriage unless u get annuled which takes years and lots of money. and even then the solicitor general can deny it so nganga pa rin ang ending. you can physicall separate but legally u are still tied to each other. even legal separation takes time and money. ur not going in a relationship thinking na magchecheat partner mo or it would end up in separation, but as you said, walang guarrantee. people can change; circumstances can change, better have a way out, just in case.
To each their own. For me lang naman, kaya hindi ako agree to live in with a man before marriage is that it takes away the excitement. And also if I agree to marry a person, I will move mountains to make it work. Kaya kung ano mang madiscover ko after the wedding, im prepared to take it.
ikaw. but how about your partner? kaya nakakatakot din minsan magpakasal kase kahit ikaw ang thinking mo is kakayanin mo lahat ng madiscvover mo after the wedding, what if yung papakasalan mo is hindi pala ganun.
Ganito na lang, wag kayo pakasal kung nasa 20's pa lang kayo. Yung tipong di nyo pa naikot ang mundo, di pa kayo management position, di pa nyo naka-date ang kung sinong gusto nyong i-date, di pa kayo nakabukod sa pamilya nyo, ganern. Kahit abutin ka pa ng 35 years old, gowrah lang!
Napansin ko lang kasi ha, pag late na nagpakasal at medyo mataas na narating at that time, both men and women to ha, they can't be bothered having affairs na. Kumbaga, decided na sila sa commitment, alam na nila gusto nila, at wala nang pagpapanggap sa mga date.
Anon 939am sounds like you’ve burned in your past marriage. I dont think setting a standard in your life makes you idealistic, young or naive. Ive been married for a long time now and nearing 40 yrs old& if i have to go back in time id still say no to a live in set up.
You never know how a guy will be after marriage. Some actually turn violent. Some cheat while the woman is pregnant. Not seeing how a person is like at home is leaving everything to luck. The best you can do is go on holiday with them and see what they’re really like.
May pros naman talaga ang living together before getting married lalo na sa panahon ngayon. Pero hindi naman ung live-in agad e isang linggo mo palang kilala lumive-in kana. Oh well, it worked naman on her favor dahil engaged na sila
Me too! my parents disagree with me but my grandparents do not. it's no joke being trapped in marriage with an abuser (physical, mental, emotional, economic) or a gold digger, cheater etc...
Well, I got her point naman. Napaka-hirap mag-pa annul tapos di naman pala kayo magwowork. Saka ako, I grew up with a parents na nag-aaway almost everyday at napaka-hirap talaga. they cannot let each other go kasi nahihiya sila sa sasabihin ng iba pero to be honest, mas hirap na hirap kami.. ang ending? Ako na lang umalis sa bahay namin para di ko na marinig away nila.
Hahaha..ako din,Yun parents ko Di Naman na masaya..puro away everyday..may 3rd party pa na cause pero dahil pressured Ng society na magwork Yun marriage..gora pa din...Kaya din takot akong magpakasal and Di Kami happy na family.
True. Nung bata ako, I wished I had a complete and happy family. My parents weren't married. Now that I'm in my late 20's mas gusto ko nlng maging masaya sila. Kaya ayun nag-asawa ng afam mama ko haha. And it doesn't bother me. Yun lng naging bitter mama ko at ayaw nya kaming magkakapatid na mag-asawa. Pero sa totoo lng hirap makahanap ng matinong lalaki kaya wala na rin akong balak magpakasal dito sa pinas
Pahiya ka dyan. They already told G3 that they will have a simple wedding this year. Sabay sila ni Derek nagkwento during the interview. And she won’t even wear a lavish gown.
2:10 can we go back to this convo in lets say April 2023? Malamang matagal na silang wala nun at walang kasal na ganap. Bet my one year salary on this. True!!!
You are right. She has lowered her expectations. And in doing so, she has lowered her self-worth tremendously. How sad...she is wasting away with a worthless boy in Derek.
Actually, because they are popular now, people would want to have them sa podcast and ang podcast with ellen laging nasa top of the list ng most listened podcast. I would also want to guest her if I have a podcast.
Why dahil live in? Kami ng kapatid ko we are both in live in arrangements. We are both happy we hang out every two weeks kasama partners namin, may mga problema pero hindi kasing panget ng mga problema ng mga pinsan namin. Sa angkan namin puro babae ang generation namin, 5 lang ata ang lalaki na pinsan ko. 2 single at lahat may asawa na meaning kasal. Our lola thinks na parehas kaming disappointment ng kapatid ko dahil ayaw pa namin magpakasal. But they don't hear cheating problems, financial problems and ugali/attitude problems from us unlike sa mga kasal naming pinsan. They all have those kind of problems every week na minsan hindi na namin matake magkapatid. Relationships isn't just about marriage.
Exactly! Ang daming nagaambag ng unsolicited advice tapos kung mali sila na sinunod mo mag isa kang magdudusa. Tapos they will deny they said such a thing
I have been in a live-in situation for 12 years now. Mutual agreement. No history of cheating. More on sa ugali ang mga issues. Napapag-usapan naman. Living-in doesnt mean cheap ka na or what not. Just respect one's decision. Yung masyadong mapanghusga, matulog nalang kayo. None of your business anyway. :)
Ok mag live in, wag lang magkaanak. Dahil pag May anak at naghiwalay, wala kang habol dahil di naman kasal. At least pag kasal, pwede mo ipakulong yung cheater.
wapakels sa mga kemerut ni Ellen sa buhay nya. But please tell Derek to stop dragging Andrea on his showbiz interview ek ek. Nkakabastos na! Tahimik na ung isa eh.
People who are against ‘live in’ are just judgemental and can’t think of a valid reason why it’s bad. They don’t want to listen to the pros or benefits of it, they’re just stuck in that crab mentality.
May kakilala ko na wala pang 1 year kinasal, ang gulo gulo na ng married life nila, partida bongga pa kasal nila haha so kung choice ng tao na live in muna, wag mag judge agad. Besides, buhay nila yan. Sino tayo para makialam?
I’m actually okay with live in arrangement. I dont plan on having kids and I don’t like marriage as well. It’s complicated pag di mag work out ang relationship. Okay na yung pack your things and leave. No legalities na dapat ayusin.
Bakit parang lahat ng comments dito eh sinasabing lalaki lang ang nagbebenefit pag live in set up? Dami kayang pros pag magkasama kayo ng partner mo. Share sa rent and bills, independence, privacy... Tsaka paano naman yung mga LGTBQ na hindi pa allowed magpakasal but are eager to be life partners.
Tsaka yung nagsasabi ng why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free... It sounds like a hooker to me. Gusto yata bayaran sila every encounter lol.
Kidding aside, marriage is not for everyone, but lifetime partnership can be.
Disclaimer, I'm happily married. We lived together 6 months before our wedding. It was practical, it made wedding planning easier and we were able to manage our expenses better, and it was fun!
If you're with the right person and you both want to get married, then you will get married regardless of lived together or not.
Tbh, na experienced ko ang live in for 2 years before getting married. I think I'm just lucky magkasundo kami, Kaya ang ending nag level up sa wedding. Walang nakakaalam sa family namin both, until now even sa anak ko I don't have plans na sabihin. Im not proud of it kasi yung moral obligation nawala, what more pa kapag nalaman ng mga anak ko. But I'm not against it,it depends kung pareho kayong mentally prepared at higit sa lahat financial stable na Kaya niyo na talagang tumayo sa sarili niyong paa.
I tried a semi live in right after graduating from college. ell I didn't know na live in pala yun kase I was supposed to just find a job in Cebu and then the guy told me to go to Pagadian with our other friend. So tumira kame sa bahay ng friend ko at kameng 2 lang sa room. 20 palang ako nun. 2 months later nagkanya2x na rin kame as he went back to our home city and I went to another city. Pero in that 2 mos walang nangyari samin, and I praise God sa self control ko because I did not want to engage in PMS. I am married now and pinagsisisihan ko yung pakikipag live in na yun. I was innocent back then. Even if it was with my husband, I still would not want for us to live together before marriage.
May successful live in couples at may successful marriage couples din naman. Yung pinagka iba lang talaga ay ang legal implications. One example pag kasal pag may mangyaring masama sa partner mo, you have the right to represent him or make the decision for him, kunyari sa mga major surgieres or matters of life and death. Kahit sabihin pa na common law union maghahanap pa din kasi ang mga hospital, banks, government offices ng mga patunay - lalo pag kaiba apelyido nyo sa ID's. Eto din yung pinaka reason talaga na pinaglalaban naming mga LGBT na ma honor ang gay marriage. Kasi kung sakali may masamang mangyari sa partner ko or sa akin wala akong karapatan sa mata ng batas para mag desisiyon para sa kanya. Yung mga plano namin, mga habilin sa isat isa at mga naipundar namin pag may mag contest duon na kamag anak nya talo talaga ako kasi wala akong legal hold sa kanya. Yun lang po .hehehe peace.
The hookup culture is the best thing that women have done to the world :) It freed men from having responsibilities :) Biruin mo, if you are a man in the top 1% of earners and good looking, you can basically bed all the good looking women for free :) Thanks a bunch to the empowered women of the world :)
Give and take iyan dahil siguradong gumagastos ang mga mayayamang lalaki na iyan sa mga babae na iyon para sa bahay, kotse, allowance, bills at kung ano-ano pa. Mahirap amg walang pera.
I don't want to judge anyone who wants to live in with a partner. Nagawa ko na kasi yan, lol. Kaso wala pa yatang 6 months si Ellen and Derek, dba? Live in is okay kung tipong years na kayo in a relationship. Ako rin kasi, nabuntis muna bago ikasal. I never believed in marriage kasi I came from a broken family. pero alam niyo, nun palagi kami nag aattend ng weddings ng husband ko, saka ko na realize na mas masarap pa rin ikasal muna before having a child or living together. ewan ko ba, nakikita ko kasi sa kanila yun blessing. basta iba feeling.
nagtataka lang ako, parang nabanggit agad annulment and wala divorce sa Pinas. do you get married thinking na o mahirap magpa annul. Ndi ba parang ang nega naman agad? I'm all for live in, done that.
Cheap talaga ni Ellen.
ReplyDeleteanona 12:22 - cheap si ellen kasi?
Deletediba nag deny si Derek na di sila live in?
DeleteMALI BA AKO?
Parang European style ang pagpapalaki ng papa ni Ellen sa kanya. She had freedom to do whatever she wanted from day one kaya no hang ups.
Deleteoo naman chipanga naman talaga si booclaaa
DeleteThat’s the Foreigners way, bf/gf live together. Then if things goes well the guy propose then get married. No biggie, but in the Philippines duh! such a big deal for choserang 🐸
DeleteHow can she say she’s raised to be independent but cant live without yaya. Sobrang patawa.
Delete4:34, ang ibig sabihin niya na independent siya ay independent sa relationship at hindi papayag na oo lang ng oo.
DeleteFor the record, not only her. All the three hosts of the podcast agree on a live in arrangement. It's 2021 already. Contempt on taboos such as living in together should have no place in the society.
ReplyDeleteFor the record, kay Ellen lang kami interesado. Wa pakels sa iba. Lol
DeleteMas okay na live in muna tbh. Para hindi gulatan ng ugali pag kasal na. Mas mahirap pag ganun
Deletewho the three host?
Delete“WHY BUY THE COW IF YOU CAN GET THE MILK FOR FREE?”
Delete(No offense to cows of the world)
Pag-isipan mo ng mabuti yan 12:23, para maisapuso mo yang moral conviction mo ha Ineng? ✌️
Kung maghihiwalay din naman ok nang di kasal. Para walang habol sa assets mo.
DeleteMarriage is so archaic concept it does not belong to our new society anymore :) Long live hookup culture :) Its a win win for men :)
Delete1:07 alam mookay lang naman kung ang tao magpakasal. Okay lang din kung hindi. Personal choice tawag dun. Mas pangit sa tao ang maging pakialamera at judgmental. Sinusuka ng langit, niluluwa ng lupa. Sorry not sorry
Delete1:07 Ay grabe siya judger. Lunukin nyo po ang moral conviction niyo. To each his own naman diba?
DeleteAnon 1:07 Welcome po mga holier than thou.
DeletePag mga comment na ganito like kay anon 1:07 talaga. Nakaka walang gana. Sabi lang naman ni 12:23 na mga talks na ganito hindi na dapat stigma ngayon. Lola ka na po siguro.
Delete1:07 Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?
DeleteYou've clearly never eaten a steak in your life.
1:07 para namang ang mapakasalan ng lalake ang greatest reward na pwedeng makuha ng babae?! NOOO. Never ba pumasok sa isip mo na yung lalake na ang may gusto pero ang babae ang may ayaw? For strong, financially able, wealthy, non-religous women, wala naman gaanong bearing ang marriage, so bakit pa? Hassle pa kung hindi mag work out. Hindi lahat gaya mong patay na patay mapakasalan.
DeleteNaku, ang mga kabataan ngayon ito na ang kasabihan: Why buy a car you have not test driven?
Delete... yun nga lang, baka malaspag ang sasakyan kaka-test drive, hahaha!
ayun naman pala so tipid na tipid na pala itong Derek. Hindi na mamomroblema magpa engrandeng wedding etc.
Deletemarriage is archaic? nothing beats a meaningful connection and solid commitment.
DeleteAgree ako sa live in muna bago kasal, as in may plano magpakasal, lalo na sa Pinas. Una, ang mahal ng annulment sa atin no, jusko! 2nd baka pagkasal na at ayaw sa ugali ng asawa, ay wla ka ng magagawa, kasal ka na eh. Lol, kung ayaw nyo sa live in, then go! Lol, walang pilitan. Wag din kayong pa holy.
Delete2:33, not everything is about sex. And laspag is such an old concept. Laspag are people who don't take care of themselve.
DeleteWow, I am more shocked at those comments justifying a living-in situation than the old adage from Anon 1:07.
DeleteWala sa panahon or ciglo ng mundo ang pagkakaroon ng solid moral convictions, core value po iyan. Paano nagiging katanggap tanggap sa mga babae o lalaki ang pagpapagamit lang sa ka live in nila. Kung sawa na palit nanaman ng partner. Not Anon 1:07, and definitely not a Lola.
To be fair relatively new concept ang kasal sa society natin cause our ancestors just have a go at it lol. And mas bago pa ang pagpapakasal/pagcohabitate dahil sa "love" cause people used to get together to gain power, build wealth, or have someone to work their farmland with them. Kung tutuusin yung hookup culture ngayon is just us coming back to our roots. And I dunno, hindi naman dapat magkasalungat yung marriage at cohabitation, they're both means para magkaroon ng union ang dalawa...or more na individuals. Dahil prevalent at mas accessible na nga ang hookups, parang yun na ang alternative sa kasal/cohabitation. Nowadays it's marriage/cohabitation vs. casual sex.
DeleteYung idiomatic expression sa 1.07 comment eh para sa self-worth yan ng isang tao. Para sa akin hindi masama ang dating. Karaniwan angkop sa kababaihan yan dahil supppsedly mas makahulugan sa babae ang pagkakaroon ng sexual relationship. Pero kung kaswal kaswal lang para sa babae yung pakikipag talik at payag na nobya lamang walang pormal na commitment, although wala naman tayong magagawa doon, eh pangit talaga tingin ng mga tao sa ganyan. Walang masama kung mas pahahalagahan ng babae ang kanyang halaga bilang tao at maging mapanuri sa pagpili ng taong tunay na mamahalin, di yung pag parausan lang hanggang ayaw na tapos papalit palit ng partner. Wag ninyo ako awayin ha.
DeleteWalang masama sa kasal. Wala din masama sa hindi kasal. Choice iyon ng bawat tao. May pros at cons bawat desisyon. Depende sa kaya mong tanggapin. Wag kayo magmayabang na parang jackpot na ikasal dahil alam naman natin na hindi yan totoo. Wag kayo mandamay kung miserable kayo!
DeleteBakit ba tingin ng mga babae na kapag ‘free’ sila makipag relationship sa kung kanikanino nila gusto eh considered ‘female empowerment’ yun?
DeleteI get na being able to freely choose, in a general sense, is indeed empowering. BUT to just loosen one’s morals and settle for a promiscuous lifestyle is not being free. Instead one becomes a victim of their own poor choices to demean themselves and settle for a life of being ‘just’ a ‘meantime girl’.
Considered ba na goal ang pagiging ‘meantime girl’? Is that something to aspire to?
Or justification Lang ng mga iba dito dahil sa ganon na path ‘napunta’ buhay nila?
1:07 who buys a cow when the cow is ugly and judger. Pakaperfect mo teh. Kanya kanyang paniniwala lang yan :)
DeleteMas agree ako sa live-in arrangement kasi you will really get to know a person pag magkasama na kayo sa ilalim ng iisang bubong like how they handle their finances, how they settle arguments and how they stay loyal... There are many things you'll find out about a person when you live with them. For some people, it's better to be prepared than to be surprised after the wedding na di pala sila compatible ng husband nila.
DeleteIf you're in a long-term relationship and considering marriage then it's not a bad idea to live together muna. Yan ang tunay na litmus test. Pero if you're still young and you're not really looking to get married, wag na lang muna mag-live in. Wag din magpapabuntis sa live-in partner kung di din naman ready magpakasal.
It's not for everyone tho. I've lived with my partner since 2019 tapos dinaanan na namin ang pandemic, unemployment, depression and typical adjustment issues ng mag-asawa. Di kami naghiwalay, di din naging issue ang cheating. We only grew together and became strong for each other. So far, so good kasi 2021 na and we're planning a small, intimate wedding. May happy ending din naman kahit nakipag-live in ka bago mag-asawa. :)
Excuse me? For you. You should respect people who think otherwise ms know it all. Not everyone ay gusto maging liberated katulad mo
Delete1:07 Nothing healthy or moral about that. Napaka archaic na statement used to scare ONLY WOMEN and control their actions, deny their sexuality and independence.
Delete2:53, hindi porke kasal ay hindi naghihiwalay o nagtsi-cheat. Nasaan ang commitment doon?
Delete1:09, agree, kapag hindi kayo kasal, walang habol sa assets at sa lahat ng pinaghirapan mo. Kapag financially independent ang tao, mas pinag-iingatan ang kabuhayan niya kesa sa kasal.
10:56 nothing is ever guaranteed in this life lol. And bec life will always have its struggles, you wanna make sure you marry someone who is aligned with your values. Now, that doesn't guarantee you won't have differences either. Both of you have leave your ego at the door and have to commit to make the marriage work. There are exceptions that makes ending a marriage necessary - e.g abuse. If you're entering into a relationship thinking your partner is going to cheat or robs you of your money, why even date or enter into a relationship? Doh.
DeleteAt least honest siya di tulad ng iba pa tweetums tapos living in or sleep over sleep over pala ang beauty....
Delete1:07 Nag live in kami ng ilang years ng jowa ko, ngayon asawa ko na. No regrets sa mga decisions namin before getting married. Masayang-masaya parin kami hanggang ngayon. Tsaka wag mo kaming ikumpara sa baka. Excuse me. Nananahimik yung baka, sinasali mo sa problema mo.
Delete1220, the thing is sa pilipinas WALANG DIVORCE. so even if inaabuso ka na, you cant really “leave” the marriage unless u get annuled which takes years and lots of money. and even then the solicitor general can deny it so nganga pa rin ang ending. you can physicall separate but legally u are still tied to each other. even legal separation takes time and money. ur not going in a relationship thinking na magchecheat partner mo or it would end up in separation, but as you said, walang guarrantee. people can change; circumstances can change, better have a way out, just in case.
DeleteTo each their own. For me lang naman, kaya hindi ako agree to live in with a man before marriage is that it takes away the excitement. And also if I agree to marry a person, I will move mountains to make it work. Kaya kung ano mang madiscover ko after the wedding, im prepared to take it.
ReplyDelete1246 Goodluck. I mean it but I believe otherwise. 😊
DeleteSiguro single ka in your 20s no? You can say that because you haven't really experienced love & life. You are still too idealistic.
DeleteSame
DeleteSpoken with the confidence of a woman who has never been married! LOL
Deleteikaw. but how about your partner? kaya nakakatakot din minsan magpakasal kase kahit ikaw ang thinking mo is kakayanin mo lahat ng madiscvover mo after the wedding, what if yung papakasalan mo is hindi pala ganun.
DeleteGanito na lang, wag kayo pakasal kung nasa 20's pa lang kayo. Yung tipong di nyo pa naikot ang mundo, di pa kayo management position, di pa nyo naka-date ang kung sinong gusto nyong i-date, di pa kayo nakabukod sa pamilya nyo, ganern. Kahit abutin ka pa ng 35 years old, gowrah lang!
DeleteNapansin ko lang kasi ha, pag late na nagpakasal at medyo mataas na narating at that time, both men and women to ha, they can't be bothered having affairs na. Kumbaga, decided na sila sa commitment, alam na nila gusto nila, at wala nang pagpapanggap sa mga date.
DeleteAnon 939am sounds like you’ve burned in your past marriage. I dont think setting a standard in your life makes you idealistic, young or naive. Ive been married for a long time now and nearing 40 yrs old& if i have to go back in time id still say no to a live in set up.
You never know how a guy will be after marriage. Some actually turn violent. Some cheat while the woman is pregnant. Not seeing how a person is like at home is leaving everything to luck. The best you can do is go on holiday with them and see what they’re really like.
DeleteMay pros naman talaga ang living together before getting married lalo na sa panahon ngayon. Pero hindi naman ung live-in agad e isang linggo mo palang kilala lumive-in kana. Oh well, it worked naman on her favor dahil engaged na sila
ReplyDeleteagree ako n live in muna bago kasal to know ur partner better...
ReplyDeleteMe too! my parents disagree with me but my grandparents do not. it's no joke being trapped in marriage with an abuser (physical, mental, emotional, economic) or a gold digger, cheater etc...
DeleteYan ang mahirap sa walang divorce, walang kawala agad pag may kalokohang ganap.
DeleteSince we still don’t have divorce laws here, it is much wiser to opt for a live-in arrangement first. So i agree with Ellen.
ReplyDeleteAGREE
DeleteWell, I got her point naman. Napaka-hirap mag-pa annul tapos di naman pala kayo magwowork. Saka ako, I grew up with a parents na nag-aaway almost everyday at napaka-hirap talaga. they cannot let each other go kasi nahihiya sila sa sasabihin ng iba pero to be honest, mas hirap na hirap kami.. ang ending? Ako na lang umalis sa bahay namin para di ko na marinig away nila.
ReplyDeleteNyahaha para palang parents ko. Tapos tatanungin nila ako bakit hindi kami magpakasal? Gusto kong isagot, “ma, hindi lahat ng kasal eh masaya”.
Deletei feel you 12:55 napakatoxic ng environment na everyday nag-aaway ang parents. kng ako lng tlga ang magdedesisyon sinabi ko na mahiwalay cla.
DeleteHahaha..ako din,Yun parents ko Di Naman na masaya..puro away everyday..may 3rd party pa na cause pero dahil pressured Ng society na magwork Yun marriage..gora pa din...Kaya din takot akong magpakasal and Di Kami happy na family.
DeleteItong segment of the comments ang agree na agree ako.
DeleteTrue. Nung bata ako, I wished I had a complete and happy family. My parents weren't married. Now that I'm in my late 20's mas gusto ko nlng maging masaya sila. Kaya ayun nag-asawa ng afam mama ko haha. And it doesn't bother me. Yun lng naging bitter mama ko at ayaw nya kaming magkakapatid na mag-asawa. Pero sa totoo lng hirap makahanap ng matinong lalaki kaya wala na rin akong balak magpakasal dito sa pinas
DeletePara talagang ayaw nya magpakasal.. muka din naman walang balak mag settle down into marriage yung bf nya bat kaya nagpropose
ReplyDeleteNa pressure
DeletePara asarin ang bashers hahahah
DeleteFor the ‘gram, lam mo na!
Deleteinunahan nya na lang, she knows kasi na wala ring pupuntahan yung "engagement" nila ni Derek
ReplyDeletePahiya ka dyan. They already told G3 that they will have a simple wedding this year. Sabay sila ni Derek nagkwento during the interview. And she won’t even wear a lavish gown.
Delete2:10 naniwala ka naman sa paandar ng 2 na yan?
Delete2:10 i feel na hndi yan totoo kasi they always go beyond the mountain para lang ipromote ang love nila sa isat isa.
Delete2:10 can we go back to this convo in lets say April 2023? Malamang matagal na silang wala nun at walang kasal na ganap. Bet my one year salary on this. True!!!
DeletePinaghahandaan mo na agad Ellen yung depensa mo kung di matuloy ang kasalan huh. Kiyemeng mas prefer ang live in hmmm
ReplyDeleteYou are right. She has lowered her expectations. And in doing so, she has lowered her self-worth tremendously. How sad...she is wasting away with a worthless boy in Derek.
DeleteSa sobrang bored nila ni Derek lahat ng podcast at interview pinapatos 🤣 bukod pa sa a&a sesh nila sa ig
ReplyDelete1:19 BWHAHAHAHAHA OO NGA
DeleteActually, because they are popular now, people would want to have them sa podcast and ang podcast with ellen laging nasa top of the list ng most listened podcast. I would also want to guest her if I have a podcast.
DeleteHater ka lang talaga, if you listen to her may wisdom ang mga sinasabi nya and I fid her smart.
DeleteUso na kasi live in ngayon guys Anu ba it’s 2021 na. Hahaha! Trial and error of Hinde nag work okay Lang move on . Ganern
ReplyDeleteCharot
2:19 sabihin mo yan kay 1:07 sa taas. May nalalaman pa kasi syang cow. Lol
DeleteEwww, she is too chepapay baduday talaga. Yuck.
ReplyDeletewell she is rich and stands to lose a lot if she married some gold digger or an abuser. I would say she is smart
Delete2:20 so if a rich and smart girl like her she is cheap, what does that make you then? Extremely, overly, superduper cheapipay?
DeletePwede mag tagalog 3:09pm
DeleteSo Hinde na siya mag papa kasal? Hahahaha
ReplyDeleteHindi lahat ng tao gusto ng kasal. 2021 na!
Delete11:18 but they are engaged, dba? kasi nagpropose na si Derek? she accepted it, meaning ikakasal na sila, not sure lang when.
DeleteHmmm, I guess she thinks she is not worthy of a committed relationship. The poor thing.
ReplyDeletemarriage does not equal committed relationship.
DeleteHahahaahahah
DeleteWhy dahil live in? Kami ng kapatid ko we are both in live in arrangements. We are both happy we hang out every two weeks kasama partners namin, may mga problema pero hindi kasing panget ng mga problema ng mga pinsan namin. Sa angkan namin puro babae ang generation namin, 5 lang ata ang lalaki na pinsan ko. 2 single at lahat may asawa na meaning kasal. Our lola thinks na parehas kaming disappointment ng kapatid ko dahil ayaw pa namin magpakasal. But they don't hear cheating problems, financial problems and ugali/attitude problems from us unlike sa mga kasal naming pinsan. They all have those kind of problems every week na minsan hindi na namin matake magkapatid. Relationships isn't just about marriage.
DeleteMeh, she is a nothing nobody.
ReplyDeleteMga pseudo alpha female na clingy pala also like Pia, por kilo na lang.
ReplyDeleteTruth hhahahaa
DeleteShut up lola Elena. Go away and be gone for good.
ReplyDeleteBuhay nila yan. Kung hindi nmn kayo ang bumubuhay sa kanila bayaan nyo na.
ReplyDeleteExactly! Ang daming nagaambag ng unsolicited advice tapos kung mali sila na sinunod mo mag isa kang magdudusa. Tapos they will deny they said such a thing
DeleteI have been in a live-in situation for 12 years now. Mutual agreement. No history of cheating. More on sa ugali ang mga issues. Napapag-usapan naman. Living-in doesnt mean cheap ka na or what not. Just respect one's decision. Yung masyadong mapanghusga, matulog nalang kayo. None of your business anyway. :)
ReplyDeleteOk mag live in, wag lang magkaanak. Dahil pag May anak at naghiwalay, wala kang habol dahil di naman kasal. At least pag kasal, pwede mo ipakulong yung cheater.
ReplyDeleteMay habol ka para sa anak mo, kasal man o hindi.
Deletenaaawa naman ako sa mga magiging bunga ng mga live-in couples. dadami ang illegitimate child
ReplyDeletewapakels sa mga kemerut ni Ellen sa buhay nya. But please tell Derek to stop dragging Andrea on his showbiz interview ek ek. Nkakabastos na! Tahimik na ung isa eh.
ReplyDeleteTinanong tungkol sa mga past relationships niya kaya sumagot.
DeletePeople who are against ‘live in’ are just judgemental and can’t think of a valid reason why it’s bad. They don’t want to listen to the pros or benefits of it, they’re just stuck in that crab mentality.
ReplyDeleteSino kaya yung ex ni Ellen that was nasty to her and her yaya 7 months into the relationship? Curious ako...
ReplyDeleteAno ang clue? Ang haba ng podcast parang nakakatamad pakinggan.
DeleteMay kakilala ko na wala pang 1 year kinasal, ang gulo gulo na ng married life nila, partida bongga pa kasal nila haha so kung choice ng tao na live in muna, wag mag judge agad. Besides, buhay nila yan. Sino tayo para makialam?
ReplyDeleteOk sabi mo eh 🙄
ReplyDeleteI’m actually okay with live in arrangement. I dont plan on having kids and I don’t like marriage as well. It’s complicated pag di mag work out ang relationship. Okay na yung pack your things and leave. No legalities na dapat ayusin.
ReplyDeleteOkay na yan. Kesa naman after ng kasal di mo pala kaya tanggapin baho ng asawa mo mahirap na kumawala. Mahaba at magastos na proseso!
ReplyDeleteBakit parang lahat ng comments dito eh sinasabing lalaki lang ang nagbebenefit pag live in set up? Dami kayang pros pag magkasama kayo ng partner mo. Share sa rent and bills, independence, privacy... Tsaka paano naman yung mga LGTBQ na hindi pa allowed magpakasal but are eager to be life partners.
ReplyDeleteTsaka yung nagsasabi ng why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free... It sounds like a hooker to me. Gusto yata bayaran sila every encounter lol.
Kidding aside, marriage is not for everyone, but lifetime partnership can be.
Disclaimer, I'm happily married. We lived together 6 months before our wedding. It was practical, it made wedding planning easier and we were able to manage our expenses better, and it was fun!
If you're with the right person and you both want to get married, then you will get married regardless of lived together or not.
YESSSS this!
DeleteAgreee! I think a lot of people will eventually consider marriage kung may divorce na sa pinas :)
DeleteTbh, na experienced ko ang live in for 2 years before getting married. I think I'm just lucky magkasundo kami, Kaya ang ending nag level up sa wedding. Walang nakakaalam sa family namin both, until now even sa anak ko I don't have plans na sabihin. Im not proud of it kasi yung moral obligation nawala, what more pa kapag nalaman ng mga anak ko. But I'm not against it,it depends kung pareho kayong mentally prepared at higit sa lahat financial stable na Kaya niyo na talagang tumayo sa sarili niyong paa.
ReplyDeleteParang lagi naman ata sya nakikipag live ine eh tama ba?
ReplyDeleteI tried a semi live in right after graduating from college. ell I didn't know na live in pala yun kase I was supposed to just find a job in Cebu and then the guy told me to go to Pagadian with our other friend. So tumira kame sa bahay ng friend ko at kameng 2 lang sa room. 20 palang ako nun. 2 months later nagkanya2x na rin kame as he went back to our home city and I went to another city. Pero in that 2 mos walang nangyari samin, and I praise God sa self control ko because I did not want to engage in PMS. I am married now and pinagsisisihan ko yung pakikipag live in na yun. I was innocent back then. Even if it was with my husband, I still would not want for us to live together before marriage.
ReplyDeleteIlang taon ka na ngayon, 23?
DeleteMay successful live in couples at may successful marriage couples din naman. Yung pinagka iba lang talaga ay ang legal implications. One example pag kasal pag may mangyaring masama sa partner mo, you have the right to represent him or make the decision for him, kunyari sa mga major surgieres or matters of life and death. Kahit sabihin pa na common law union maghahanap pa din kasi ang mga hospital, banks, government offices ng mga patunay - lalo pag kaiba apelyido nyo sa ID's. Eto din yung pinaka reason talaga na pinaglalaban naming mga LGBT na ma honor ang gay marriage. Kasi kung sakali may masamang mangyari sa partner ko or sa akin wala akong karapatan sa mata ng batas para mag desisiyon para sa kanya. Yung mga plano namin, mga habilin sa isat isa at mga naipundar namin pag may mag contest duon na kamag anak nya talo talaga ako kasi wala akong legal hold sa kanya. Yun lang po .hehehe peace.
ReplyDeleteTama ka. Kaya dito sa NZ okay ang civil union to protect the assets of the couple.
DeletePuwede kang gumawa ng legal trust, last will and testament at medical will para sa mga concerns mo.
DeleteThe hookup culture is the best thing that women have done to the world :) It freed men from having responsibilities :) Biruin mo, if you are a man in the top 1% of earners and good looking, you can basically bed all the good looking women for free :) Thanks a bunch to the empowered women of the world :)
ReplyDeleteGive and take iyan dahil siguradong gumagastos ang mga mayayamang lalaki na iyan sa mga babae na iyon para sa bahay, kotse, allowance, bills at kung ano-ano pa. Mahirap amg walang pera.
DeleteHahahahaha, well that’s a real free-bee to men. No need for commitment or responsibility.
ReplyDeleteTrue 2:10. Why settle down if you can get "marriage" benefits? Lol.
DeleteDisclaimer just in case. 🤷♀️
ReplyDeleteI don't want to judge anyone who wants to live in with a partner. Nagawa ko na kasi yan, lol. Kaso wala pa yatang 6 months si Ellen and Derek, dba? Live in is okay kung tipong years na kayo in a relationship. Ako rin kasi, nabuntis muna bago ikasal. I never believed in marriage kasi I came from a broken family. pero alam niyo, nun palagi kami nag aattend ng weddings ng husband ko, saka ko na realize na mas masarap pa rin ikasal muna before having a child or living together. ewan ko ba, nakikita ko kasi sa kanila yun blessing. basta iba feeling.
ReplyDeletenagtataka lang ako, parang nabanggit agad annulment and wala divorce sa Pinas. do you get married thinking na o mahirap magpa annul. Ndi ba parang ang nega naman agad? I'm all for live in, done that.
ReplyDeleteBaka naman iyon lang talaga ang gusto ng lalaki sa kanya. I wonder kung iyan pa rin ang sasabihin niya kung May magooffer ng kasal sa kanya.
ReplyDelete